I know what you mean Deena. I'm grateful for my progress but STILL when stressed, I think of AL. Yesterday I was not feeling great, and then was rushing around, stressful meeting at my daughter's school, then took her out to dinner to talk about it. Of course my head said "I NEED a cosmo to calm me down." Just felt like what I have always done, habit. The good news is that I had that one, then came home and about two hours later asked my husband to make me another. I started to drink it but then sort of tuned in and realized "I don't want this, it is too strong and I won't feel well tomorrow." So I threw at least half of it away. So there is progress, just not as much as we would like.

It is crazy that a hospital doesn't have healthy food. Sort of like the schools: what is up with the pizza and chicken nuggets there? Seriously? BUT good for you for just picking yourself up and starting again. That is how you will win in the end.

xoxo Newlife

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Throwing away half a cosmo? That is progress. I do know exactly what you are saying, though, Newlife. As much progress as that is, you want to be one of those people who no longer consider ordering a cosmo to calm you down. You want the desire for alcohol to go away as it does for so many. Me, too. We have to remember what Guapo said, "The beauty of TSM, is that you will eventually not want to drink". It will happen for us.

Thanks, Jaba. JoAnna does sound like a truly caring and helpful person from what you have said. I went there to look around after Dr. Eskapa posted here and I read a post from one of the moderators, I don't remember which one, that said that she is sick of having to spend her time clearing up misconceptions that people pick up on this forum. The post came across as quite condescending and totally turned me off. At some point I will have to go back and look around for one post does not make a forum and I am sure that there is information that might help me there.

I think that hospitals are trying to have better food. By the time I realized that they were going to admit my friend, it was late and the hospital cafeteria was closed for most things. Had I been there earlier I could have had a fresh salad made to my liking.

D, I think you're talking about the options save lives forum. They did say something along those lines, but I think Joanna on there is actually pretty straight up and has done TSM herself. The other moderator hasn't

It's still worth reading some of the things they talk about, although that forum is far less active than this one.

Just for sh--s and giggles, try some Reddit threads regarding alcoholism, and the concept of drinking In moderation.

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tsm just continues to help me in its own way and I know it works for me. it's really saved me. strangely enough, I've never been on the OSL forum because THIS seems to be the option for me. maybe sometime I can investigate it further....

Jaba, I am sorry if it sounded like I was putting JoAnna down in some way or that I thought her actions were not "forgivable". I do not know anything about her but from what you and others have said, it sounds like she is committed to helping others and volunteers a lot of time to it. I admire that. As I said earlier, I would not judge someone on one post. I only commented on the flavor of the forum that I got from going there once. It did not feel automatically welcoming to me as this forum did, so I felt no need to go back. I have the book and the basic information in it, and I have found incredible support and encouragement here. I know the rule, I follow the rule, I work on moderation techniques, and I try to keep a positive attitude. As zontar stated, I seem to get what I need here. Do you think I should I be panicking because I am not further along than I am? Is it your feeling that this is not working the way it should for me and that I should be doing something different? I know that you care deeply about the people here and I appreciate your advice and concern.

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Deena & Jaba,

Just reading through your last exchange regarding Joanna from the OSL board... It's so obvious that you all really care for each other here and I have found the right place to come to for support. I hope that I will be able to be as helpful and supportive to others as they join us on the adventure of extinction as you have been to me (and countless others...) I just wish I had more to offer you and the many others that have been helping me, too (Zontar, Cheeto, Badger, Meggie, Maggie just to name a few!

Keep up the good work and thank you again for being so respectful and mindful of other people's feelings when you post!

MinnieMom, I think what you commented on is what makes this such a safe place for me and so many others. I love that people are here to help without judgement and feel that everyone comments with the purest of intentions.

Jaba, I think that I just need to be a little more patient and focus on the changes not what hasn't changed. Gratitude...I need to be grateful for what is.

Guapo, I will read some reddit threads on moderation.