I'm having a very difficult time separating craving and habit. I thought about this all week-end, and actually, it seems I never crave alcohol. I am so ingrained in my habits of daily life, that drinking is just a part of it. I feel so pathetic that I have no social life. My social life is me with my wine and tv or pc. Friday, I talked with a friend and former co-worker for about an hour and a half on the telephone, it was fun catching up. I can't remember when I went to bed, but as usual I drank my 2 bottles of wine. Saturday morning I was miserable, a hang-over, which is rare, no headache, but lethargic and just really out of sorts. I suspect I was drinking faster than usual while talking on the phone, which sometimes happens. But I've been out of sorts all of yesterday and most of today (drank my 2 bottles last night). I feel more depressed, and although I'm drinking my wine, it's not so much I want it, as I just do it. I was paying bills this afternoon and when I saw how much I spent on wine in the last 2 weeks I was appalled and ashamed. I had to actually transfer funds from savings to cover everything. I have never, never, ever had to 'steal' from savings for alcohol. Well, I've digressed from what I want to know really, is there a line between craving and habit? What is it? I know (in my case) it's a habit out of control for sure. But do I crave it more than I realize? And just think it's a habit? I'd like to hear your opinons!

petal

It's all habit and anxiety-management for me. I actually hate alcohol.

I'm a good-looking, deeply caring, intelligent, well-educated fellow who has just slipped into this alcoholic state through being socially isotaled for so many years (along with family tragedies, blah blah blah). Oh and the genes, which are very much present. My peers all earn £50 000 + a year and some of them very much more than that. It's just circumstance I guess and my own weakness of character that have prevented me doing the same, and alcohol plays into that a lot.

All I wish for in life is a beautiful-hearted gal who I could love so much, and be loved back by. One day I will find her, but right now I am stuck in such a vicious circle of drinking and just trying to get myself through day-to-day.

I digress from your post petal, I'm sorry. I think so much of it is habit rather than craving. I tried to measure my craving levels here when I joined, but I just can't. I don't crave alcohol, I just crave peace of heart; relief from my anxiety, and that is why I drink mostly (apart from my genetic preponderence to alcohol addiction which, just seven weeks in, TSM has already 'cured' I feel, even though I am drinking as much as ever).

All the best to you, hopefully we will be cured together

8

Great topic,....

I too am dealing with my first week. First off,...you are a pioneer in a new way of treatment which needs to be commended. The sad truth though is,...if you go to the generic forms of recovery with 12 steps etc etc etc...you will initially see better results because the drinking stops but the addiction isn't cured...so we look horrible because there is still a 3 month course of hell which they don't have.

I 'm finding though,..that those that stick with the program after 3-6 months have been free from that dire need of "Oh,..what if I relapse"...I was AA for 5 years...it was great until I was blindsided literally by a gin and tonic...over 3-6 months I was back at my habit,..Which ironically they say if you drink without Nal,..you'll be back as well....I am drinking less but close to normal these days....less cravings for sure,...I'm a martini in right now with a beer coming...best,..

Hi Petal
I can identify with drinking through social isolation. I know the biggest trigger for me has been being home alone at weekends. I too have never been able to measure craving. Maybe you could experiment with doing something different - i don't know what your circumstances are but is there a way you can test this 'habit' either by going out or inviting someone over or redecorating . Others here have decided to change type of drink- to test if it is the alcohol they crave or the habit- just a few suggestions.

To me, the difference between habit and craving is the amount of effort it would take to not drink. If it's purely "habit", you should be able to say to yourself, "I'm not drinking tonight because this is just habit and I'm cutting down." On the other hand, if you are craving alcohol, it is a lot harder to turn down the drink. Last week I was pretty sure I was just drinking out of habit -- I went out and socialized a lot and drank because that's what I do when I go out and at the same time I had no real craving to drink. This week I tested myself and stayed home all week and did not go out. I had no craving to drink at all so I didn't. That's the difference to me between habit versus craving -- if you are drinking simply out of habit, you can decide not to drink and there will be no craving.

I im in control of my habits. If I cannot control my craving, then that is addiction.

Hi petal,

You'll find a few more opinions on the following thread:

viewtopic.php?f=7&t=592&hilit=urge+habit

All the best.

V.

Hi Folks,

In my case, there are times when I drink out of habit. A common trigger that causes me to drink out of habit is the time of day. When it gets to around 6:00pm, I'm starting to think about my first drink of the day. No craving, just habit. When this occurs, I sometimes recognize what's happening and then I make a conscious effort to delay the drink. I need to get better at doing this.

Then there are times when I drink because I feel the need for a drink. Typically, this is brought on by the desire to self-medicate against anxiety, which results from my anxiety disorders. For me, needing a drink is what I equate with craving.

Just my two penn'orth.

V.

Thanks everybody for your input and opinions. You're right lena, habits can (should be) controllable. I have many times in the past not drink for a few days in a row, I think now since I started TSM I've made myself drink every night to get the cure. I need to round up what little control I've had in the past. And soulbythesea, you're right, the biggest trigger for me is also being home alone, which is all the time. I'm married but we're divorcing but he's still living here still sharing the bed. Other than that he's never here, so we don't have much contact. It's very difficult for me.

In the past I have tried changing my drink - vodka and lemon flavored Perrier. That didn't last long, I always felt terrible and felt I looked really old. I tried beer, made me all bloaty. So back to the wine....

Virgil, thanks for the other thread, very interesting reading, all this puts things in a new light for me, and helps to try and change how I look at craving vs. habit.

And thanks to minneapolisnick as well to your view on habit and craving, it agrees with lena. So, I guess I do crave, since sometimes (a lot of the time) I think I need to drink to deal with my anxiety regarding my home life. But as I said I think since I just started TSM, I guess I had in my mind that I had/have to drink every night to get the cure. I'm in a better place today. No wine in the house, will go to work soon, and perhaps I can talk myself into just coming home tonight without stopping at the liquor store. We'll see!

Thanks for the support,
petal

Petal
Your question is one that bugged me alot too . The good news is that in the
end it becomes a misnomer . You may have to put up with an odd senstion of disorientation when you meet habitual drinking situations and yet just don't feel like a drink .But that really is it if you don't feel like it you will be less likely to do it just as you want go jogging if you were unathletic . It'll happen more and more and will require other activities that don't preclude alcohol . Q talked of feeling like a restless teenager and I've had my weird moments preparing to drink getting down bottles in the shop and putting them back . Maybe one day this will pass . Til then you might checkout all the common tricks to aid drinking less ( At the Moderation Management site for example ) help you keep the habit in check.
i noted you said you don't crave much but feel you react by habit and to situations . If the craving is simultaneous to drinking we don't realize it so much . I was sure problems made me drink but reckon they were simultaneous to a raw need for the drink but if I drank frequently I didn't crave so noticeably .